I read a post on Faceboook earlier about a checklist if you THINK you are ready to have a kid. It totally cracked me up! Because, of course it is an exaggerated version... but not really. And once you are a parent you will realize there is so much truth in that statement!
The one that stuck with me the most:
Find a friend that has kids and berate them as much as possible over their methods of discipline, lack of tolerance, etc. THATIS THE LAST TIME YOU WILL EVER HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS! duh...
Then it occured to me: And I feel like a broken record, but we as parents might only be "fake" supportive of one another? I mean how many of us walk around passing judgement of other parents and their children?!?? While instead, we should be lending an ear of listening or a shoulder to cry on. Because isn't that what we all need from time to time? A safety net from our networks? I would love to hear feed back on this because I know I am not the only with these thoughts!
I think we as parents tend to be judgmental of each other. It's just so darn easy to say (or think) "well, I would do it this way, so that is obviously the wrong way!" It's especially easy if a child is having a meltdown or behaving badly.. The truth of the matter is, every kid is going to behave badly at some point (hello, terrible twos anyone?!) and they are generally going to do it out in public and embarrass their parents. It's so easy to judge someone if you think you would do something differently, but every child is different and reacts to each situation uniquely. I think that more judgment comes from parents who have "easy" children. When you have a child who is calm or quiet (more so than most children) it's easy to judge some parent of a rambunctious, loud child. Parents of loud, adventurous children are often more "tolerant" of the parent who is trying to quiet their 2 year old while they are screaming in the store for a barbie.. they are at least more likely to spare a look of pity and understanding :-)
ReplyDeleteAs for the "fake supportive", I think that depends on your network. I have had a chance to meet a group of moms (that are spread out all over the US) that have been the best support group around! Combine them with my sister and one of my best friends, Michelle, and I have a great group of supportive moms if I ever need an ear! I can see the "fake support" from parents you don't know or barely know though..
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